FROM WILLIAM: At the end of next month Bryn and I will celebrate our 20th Wedding Anniversary!!! It’s quite a milestone in my life, not that I needed more milestones, but I have to say I like this one. I love Bryn more than I have ever done; she is my best-friend, my parenting partner, my lover and my life’s companion. Definately something to scream, shout and be grateful for.
We would not have made it this far without a way to navigate all the challenges (and there have been many), both within the marriage and outside of the marriage, without a philosophy or perspective to help guide us. For us this was the Option Process – the understanding that we have a choice, that our feelings come from our beliefs and these beliefs we can decide to change, keep, or discard. We are responsible for our own happiness and unhappiness, no matter how big, and blaming another person (in this case your partner) for how you feel is at best a distraction from owning your own feelings and choices. Without a doubt Bryn and I have been profoundly challenged and made ourselves unhappy (anger, frustration, sad, lonely, guilt, self pity, etc…I have given myself all of these at one time or another) yet it has been the belief that we get to choose how we feel, regardless, that has been the anchor and grounding force in my life and my marriage with Bryn.
In the next month I will be celebrating Bryn and our life together. I will also be celebrating the fact that I was blessed enough to found a way to live my life. I will also be grateful for the Option Process and for Bears and Samahria for shining the light of this process so big that I could not miss it. I live a different life and have a different marriage because of it.
Love and smiles