Free from the Chains of “I Have To”
I just wanted to share a lovely email from a Son-Rise Program mom… She’s recently found her inspiration again and it was so beautiful, I just had to share it…
“…sometimes when I’m playing, he is so deep in stimming that I feel like throwing up. 🙂 And on our last call you helped me understand my fear about having postponed my life and my career until Vuk ‘graduates’ from the Son-Rise Program (which in turn was making me very upset when I didn’t see progress)…
Our conversation made me decide that I will allow for thoughts about my career right away. On days when I felt unhappy I would feel so sorry for myself that I had made myself stop the lawyering and the career that was going well…blah blah…
But at the thought of going back to work I felt like I would throw up again 🙂 (Funny I never throw up for real – I guess only in my thoughts 😉
I realized that I was just trying to figure out how to keep a career that I started and that I really didn’t enjoy at all – but didn’t like to face the prospect of leaving it because I had put so much effort into it for years before.
Then, I listened to the Optimal Self Trust CD and this just clenched my problem completely. It told me that I can live my life by following what I think is right (or simply do what I want) even though I don’t have a logical support for it. What a relief! So I have been trying this for a week or so now –
I don’t go to eat until I want to, and then I eat what I want.
I don’t play with my son when I think I should –
I play with him when I want to play with him.
And I DO go play with him!
(It used to be that I would feel like playing but then I would say “Oh no, I need to address this issue and make some kind of schedule in order to give myself comfort that I will not fail again in playing with him regularly…”) So in fact I would stop myself from doing what I want – because it wasn’t part of a logically prepared plan ??? Seems hilarious now.
SO, it appears that a lot of things in life WILL happen if you just do them when you WANT to do them.