What we believe about the people closest to us can determine how we act around them and the opportunities we offer them. This is particularly true with our children. It is easy to become complacent about how much we know our children. After all we have known them all their lives, sometimes we can predict how each of our children will react to certain situations, often we are right. This we then use as evidence that what we believe about our children is true. However our children are changing and growing everyday.
Here are the Autism Treatment Center of America we believe that parents are the best resource a child has, the best people to help their children. One of the first things we help our parents to do is to look at their child with fresh eyes, as if they had never meet them before and set aside any preconceived ideas and beliefs that they have about what their child will or will not do.
How many time have you said about your child, ” Oh, he won’t do that”, “Oh, he does not like hats”, “Oh, he can’t draw”, “He’ll never eat that.” Maybe you have had previous evidence that he has not done those things, but now it has become hard and fast fact that is now immovable.
At the Son-Rise Program Intensive we have a wonderful family and their 8 year old daughter with autism. We were told that she does not like vegetables and will not eat them, that she has not had a carrot since she was 18 months old.
Monday lunch time our talented child facilitator Kim Korpady offered her a carrot. Now, Kim did not know that she did not like carrots, and believed without a doubt that she would eat the carrot – and she did! Then she ate another one, then another one, then some cucumber, then some green beans!!
Because her family believed she would not eat vegetables they did not offer them, when clearly she had changed. Think of something today that you have not offered your child recently because you have had previous experience that they did not do it or like it, and offer that thing again.
I f they do it – cheer them; if they do not do it – offer it again in a few days, and then again in a few days – do not give up offering. Keep your mind open to the belief that one day your child might just want to try this activity.
Maybe today will be the time your child decides to try it.
Have fun offering things to your lovely children.
With much love