Building Desire

From Kate Wilde: Building desire within an autistic child to want to connect, interact and create friendships, that is what the Son-Rise Program is all about. If a child has that desire within them, then they are more likely to be spontaneous and to initiate interactions. We want our children to willingly and freely choose us over their exclusive world.

How do we do that?
1. By joining in actively and passionately when our children are isming. This way we populate their exclusive world with people, who are friendly and interested in what they are interested in. Not requesting nor initiating anything of our own. By doing this we give them time and space to initiate interaction with us. If we are constantly offering and requesting during this time we do not give our children that opportunity.
2. Springing into action by responding to all our children’s initiations. There are so many; when they look at us; when they touch us; take us by the hand and move us; when they talk to us;when they ask for something whether they communicate their want with a gesture or with words; when they take something from us; when they give us something, even if it is something that they are discarding. All of these are initiations towards us.
3.Respond to these initiations, here at the Autism Treatment Center of America we call them “green lights”. Respond with verbal celebrations, and with gestural celebration. Let your child know that you like it when they initiate interaction in this way
4. Respond to these green lights with ACTIONS. Get the thing they are wanting, respond to what they are saying with an action, take the object they are giving you and do something interesting with it. If they give you a ball you could roll it, or pretend to eat it. If they take something from you, maybe the train your were holding, offer them another one, if they take that, then offer another. Show them that something fun, interesting and useful happens when they initiate these green lights of interaction with you.
Have fun playing with your beautiful children.
With love

One Response

  1. Anonymous says:

    Thanks Kate,
    I love the idea of eating the ball – so fun : )
    Love Alison

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