FROM WILLIAM: When you have created a connection and built a game or activity with your child you are then in a position to make a request of them. What you request (i.e. Looks at others to start/continue an interation; Speaks in simple sentences; Interacts around simple shared objects/activities; Participates in another’s activity; etc.) is based on the goals you have chosen after establishing your child’s level of social development using The Son-Rise Program Developmental Model.
An essential ingredient to Inspirng Growth and requesting while in a game or an activity is PAUSING. You pause after you make the request to allow your child time to respond. Pausing is a communication to your child that there is something for them to do, that they can participate even more in this current social interaction. As one Son-Rise Program mother told me, Pausing is ultimately believing that your child is capable of what you are asking them to do.
If you are not pausing, ask yourself “why?”. In my training to become a Son-Rise Program Child Facilitator I did not pause because I was afraid to loss the interaction, afraid that the child would go back to being repetitious, self stimulating and exclusive if I challenged them to grow. What I came to realise was that I could still feel good and enjoy being with the children when they were in their self stimulating exclusive activities. Additionally, I wanted to believe that the children, like all of us, are capable of growing and changing – all I was doing was offering them an opportunity, a choice, to do so.
Next time you are working with your child allow yourself to pause (pause for up to 15 seconds) when you are making a request from them.
Have a great next session with your child.
Love and smiles