Lessons in Letting Go #1 – Wanting vs. Needing in Self-Studentship

FROM KELLI: The last you heard from me was March after our amazing Son-Rise Intensive Program. It was there that I started on my journey of “letting go”, and so much has happened since then – with me, with Jordyn, with our program, and our team – so stay tuned :).

At the Intensive, I started to get how much I needed to control my own environment – that things had to be a particular way, that I’m never satisfied with the results I’m producing with the team, with Jordyn, in my relationship, etc. I started to discover and confront how much my need to control keeps a lid on my experience of joy, satisfaction, connectedness, and freedom – never mind a lid on everyone’s experience around me. That was the first step, just getting the degree to which I was run by my needs.
The second thing was to really get that there was nothing wrong with that. Had I not fully accepted it, it would have been more of the same (needing to control that part of me that I couldn’t accept). In getting that there was nothing wrong (fully accepting myself), I could really create a want vs. a need to discover and dismantle the beliefs that weren’t working for me.
Wanting was the key to allowing myself to be a happy detective of myself, to see myself full-blown, and explore the threads of the tapestry of beliefs and practices I had so expertly woven to survive and to thrive in life.
That was my first lesson in letting go – to let go of my need to let go, and create it as a want… only then did I create the space for the learnings to show up… fancy that.
Where can you transform a need into a want in the interest of creating freedom, joy, and discovery?
With much love – Kelli

One Response

  1. Anonymous says:

    This is just want I needed. I discovered that most of my volunteers are better than me in terms of not needing any performance. My son is also becoming verbal, and often time I want so much for him to speak that I actually forgot/overlook his effort in communicating himself in other ways.
    Great post and helps a lot.

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