FROM WILLIAM: When people say “Just let go” what exactly are they talking about. When I say to myself whilst in the middle of a challenging or difficult situation “just let go” what am I telling myself to do?
I normally say this to myself when I am tense, anxious, upset etc. I am encouraging myself to be relaxed and at ease with the situation I am currently getting myself unhappy about. I am asking myself to let go of my unhappiness. It’s interesting, the phrase “just let go – relax, be easy” suggests that in some way I am holding on, attaching myself to my unhappiness. I believe I choose how I feel. I also believe that when I become aware that I am unhappy that I can choose to let go of (discard, shed, etc.) my unhappiness. So letting go is definitely an option for me.
If I continue to stay unhappy (anxious, sad, frustrated, etc.) then I am doing the opposite of letting go, I am holding on. In fact I must want to hold on to my unhappiness. During those times I must have a greater trust in being unhappy as a way to solve my challenges and difficulties, hence the continuing to hold on and not letting go.
In order to let go I have to dig a little deep in helping myself – now I remind myself of what occurs when I am unhappy – my body is tense, my blood pressure increases, I am less creative, the emotion does not feel good, I am less loving to others, I am less inviting to be with, etc. I also remind myself about why being happy is more useful – my body is relaxed, I am more open, I am more creative and flexible, I am more loving with the people around me, I am more inviting to others, I may not get what I want be I can still be happy (easy, at peace, enthusiastic, joyful, etc). Being clear about the impact of unhappiness and happiness on my life helps me in my decision to let go.
Think of an unhappiness you have and let go of it and trust that being happy will be more useful to you and everyone around you. It also feels good to not hold on to unhappiness.
Love and smiles